Dalya Arussy's Writing New York Blog

Journal Entry 31- Reflections
December 7, 2010, 4:10 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I think it really takes time for this feeling to change. I have definitely made progress, but that sense of the ‘other’ is still ingrained in me. I still feel like a suburbs girl. I still feel like New York City is more of a tourist attraction than a home. And I still feel very small among the towering skyscrapers. Nonetheless, I have started to feel more comfortable in the NYC setting. I have learned that many people have this sense of the ‘other’ and through the diversity that I think defines NYC, everyone can find a way to fit in. I think the major change has been that I now see the importance of embracing the feeling of the ‘other’ in order to feel like an insider, because so many others contain that feeling.

A key part of my experience in NYC that I did not mention was my lacking sense of direction, or inability to navigate this dense expanse of land. A major component of my feeling like the ‘other’ stems from my lack of acquaintance with the area, and subsequently my total loss of direction. I have to research destination routes online, pull out maps on the subway, and occasionally ask a passerby for directions. Because I feel physically lost, I therefore feel emotionally lost, not feeling like I belong. This navigation component plays a major role in my experience of the city and thereby plays a crucial part in the changing of that experience. By learning to physically navigate my way around the city, I learn to do so emotionally too. Living in Queens has gotten the wheels turning, but there is still awhile more to go.

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